Top 10 Parenting Tips
Dr Keith’s 10 tips to make you become a better parent.
- How you handle your own difficulties
- How you talk to people in your world
- Your own health habits
- What substances you use to relax and enjoy yourself
TO CHANGE YOUR CHILDREN – CHANGE YOURSELF
I’m sorry if you thought I had some quick fix – some miraculous cure for problem children, but this is the key. (Some great ideas are coming up)
a) Your own negative habits, reactions, thoughts, and beliefs are NOT the real you – they are your negative personalities (NP’s), so when one is triggered for whatever reason
- Keep your mouth shut
- Walk away from the situation that is stimulating your negative emotion or reaction. In this way you start to control your NP. It is the beginning of clearing this habit right out of your life. This is particularly important when handling difficulties with children – Be firm but not angry.
- If you go to my website www.keithmaitland.com you can download the section on clearing for free to get you started.
b) Whenever you talk to the people in your world – do it patiently, respectfully and take time with them. This demonstrates to your children that people do matter. Each time you fall short of this, just remember it’s another NP that needs clearing.
c) Correct your own health habits – Your children are watching you and are taking their cue from you. Are you treating your body like a garbage dump (drinking, smoking or eating junk food). You’re saying to your children – my body doesn’t matter, which is interpreted as “I don’t matter”. This affects anyone who loves and cares for you – You Do Matter! Start working on getting your body healthier today- not only will you feel healthier, it will improve you attitude and allow you to handle difficult situations more calmly.
d) Look at what substances you use to relax. Recreational drug use has its roots in a common human habit, taking something (alcohol, smoking, drugs, food, coffee, chocolate etc) to make yourself feel better or more relaxed. Work out what it is that is making you feel bad or stressed then work on changing that, so you don’t need anything to make yourself feel good or relaxed because you already do.
Your own improved demonstration will be having an impact already – keep going!
What we suppress our children tend to express:
Now don’t beat yourself up – I know you’re doing your best, but we can all do better.
Observe your child or teenager’s negative behaviour and ask yourself, “where do I exhibit the same behaviour”. Sometimes this is easy to see, otherwise look for those 0.1% subtle behaviors, anger, frustration, impatience, intolerances, desire to make people pay, rejecting others, wanting to hurt others as you hurt, etc or is it give up, overwhelm or apathy. Be honest with yourself. What you’re looking for here is known as the “The Law of Reflection”. Your negative patterns are reflected back at you by the people in your world for you to see –you can see them in others but not in yourself.
What I’m asking you to can be quite confronting, but the benefits of clearing our childs negative behaviour in ourselves is HUGE. It unlocks some of the most difficult relationship issues.
Stop expecting the person behaving the worst to change first! Change yourself and you make it easier for them to change.
How do you change a negative behaviour? – Go to my website and download “The Fourth Key- Clearing” for free.
Your own relationship:
The closeness, happiness, and respectfulness and quality of relationship with your spouse, sets the tone for all relationships within the house. Start improving yours today. The “4C’s to Relationship” (also found in the clearing) will help.
Closeness and happiness are normal in a relationship – if this is not happening in your relationship, clear what’s blocking it.
Anyone who over-reacts to situations and is continually stuck in a negative emotion, should have the health of their brain checked by a suitably qualified practitioner. If you have a brain health issue in your family, have yourself checked.
Parasites, candida, moulds, cranials, spinal or chemical misalignments, heavy metal and pesticide toxicity all affect our thoughts and behaviour, as do allergies or general toxicity. Improve the quality of the food that goes into your body – fresh is always best, and decrease sugar, food additives, colourings and flavour enhancers, etc.
Good health is normal!
Spend time one on one or with your children, not just watching TV together – Do something positive with them, letting them know they are important!
Your behaviour and reactions to their behavior is improving, so one on one time will improve as well.
Never tell a child they are BAD!
Always separate a child from their behaviour. I love you, I just don’t like your behaviour
Never tell a child they are:
- No good
- Not good enough
Always be positive in your encouragement – If you don’t feel this, keep your mouth shut and go to clearing.
We are responsible for out reactions to any behaviour our child exhibits, so clearing, releasing and changing any negative reaction, behaviour or thoughts maybe required (go to that free email on clearing). Once our normal happy, positive attitude returns we’re ready to handle/decide what to do about the situation with our child or children.
Be firm but not angry, and then decide what to do!
Tip No. 8
Get your child involved:
Get your child into some activity that channels their energy into something positive, which will teach them life long skills- sport, music, art etc. It also teaches them how important a healthy body is, and they will be influenced by adults with positive creative healthy attitudes.
Tip No. 9
Improve the health of your home, clean, aerate, paint, de-clutter, wash, get rid of any moulds. This will all improve the vibe of your home, which has a positive effect on everyone.
Parenting is a process of letting go:
Most children naturally want more freedom than we are willing to give – clear any fears this may stimulate. Now your good intention will shine through as you put down boundaries.
Always be willing to review your decision and explain –“ that it is just my opinion, and that doesn’t make it right, but it is my responsibility to make it”
“Being a parent is a sacred duty the future of the world depends on your efforts, start doing a better job today “ – Dr Keith